Verbal Bulimia and the Art of Over Disclosure

by Sandra L. Brown, M.A.    (re-printed on VOP with permission of the author)

The Institute for Relational Harm Reduction, and author of How to Spot a Dangerous Man and Women Who Love Psychopaths.
http://www.saferelationships.com

I wrote about it in my Dangerous Man book, rediscussed in Women Who Love Psychopaths, and frequently remind everyone in the newsletters and yet I stll see this embarrassing behavior among women that not only sounds GROSS to anyone else listening, but also puts her at tremendous risk amongst pathologicals.

Years ago when I had a few psychopaths in group, I asked them how they picked out their “targets” and from the mouth of babes they said,

Psychopath? How Bad?

“I’ve seen people sit around with the list of traits from the PCL-R and decide from that quick-hit perusal that an acquaintance or spouse is a psychopath.  A clinician who takes the disorder seriously would not do that.” –Katherine Ramsland, chair, Social Sciences at DeSales University and author of The Human Predator.

Approximately 1% of the population is thought to be psychopathic, yet:

 –Psychopaths commit more than 50% of all serious crimes –

-Half of all law enforcement murdered in the line of duty were killed by a psychopath

–Approximately 1 out of 5 persistent domestic abusers are thought to be psychopathic

–50% of all serial rapists are thought to be psychopathic.

Although criminal behavior tends to go hand in hand with psychopathy, not all psychopaths engage in criminal behavior that is grounds for arrest.  Or if they do,

Half brother wants sex, engages in smear campaign, tries to have victim falsely arrested

I had a sociopathic half brother try to have innapropriate relations with me after I found him in my early thirties and he also tried to get me arrested by stating I attacked him and was belligerent and scratched him too – because I would not go along with being in a relationship with him. He made sure I lost my job and started fights with me there after I got him hired, because after I met him he

Been arrested or almost arrested due to the Psychopath?

In reading various message boards I am struck by how many people have been falsely arrested during their involvement with the psychopath, and also how many people were “almost” arrested or investigated due to the psychopath making false allegations against them.  And the most striking thing is that some of these psychopaths have a rap sheet (although not necessarily of violent type crimes) a mile long, while most of the victims have no arrest record at all until they get caught in the psychopath’s web.  If this has happened to you, please comment below.  Or if you would like to tell your story in full length as a featured post (it can be as long as you want as I can break it down into multiple posts), please email:  VOPvictims@yahoo.com

“Sunshine’s” Comments to “Why Sex Binds”

A poster using the handle of “Sunshine” made some comments on the page titled, “Why Sex Binds”.   After reading her description of her sexual relationship with an obviously dangerous man and her honesty in the effect it had on her, I felt her story should be brought up front for a post of its own.  I believe many who have been involved with a sociopath or psychopath can identify with Sunshine’s feelings.   Sunshine’s comments:  

So.. So true! I was once involved with a dangerous man in my late 20’s. 3 years of hell. He went to jail for 9 mos. Stalked, strangled and beat me too.  I know this may sound sick, but at the time the sex seemed out of this world